credits

This is actually my 100th post I've made on my blog. My little diary, where I could retell what happened during my days. 

How I felt, mostly the sadness and depression I went through, along my not-so-stable relationship with love.

What better way to end it, no? I think it is, I literally just sat here and went back and read all of my old posts. 

It kinda made me chuckle you know, doesn't that happen to everyone though? Finding something from the past, and kinda just sitting there.

Dazed.

Reminiscing, realising how minimal my problems were back then, how the future me would do the same to my problems right now.

It's been a little bit over two years since my first post on this, I still remember my first layout, and how difficult I found to edit it.

How addicted I was to Owl City back then, Vanilla Twilight was my favourite song from them. How my name, Micho, was originally Michou, a band that I liked. 

So, I'm ending this with a quick response to all the people I started this blog with. 

To Sora/Monkey/정나영/언니 -

We don't talk any more, but that's fine I guess. You have your life, so do I. I'm happy that you found someone else other than the Bear, the Bear you were chasing for so long, so hard trying to grab his attention, how you would flock to him, but isn't it funny now that you think about it? You were the one that actually spoke to me first, even though I met Nina first, you introduced to this to me. I was just a boy who wore a black hoodie everyday, and directly came home from school everyday just to play games. You even tried Manga Fighter just to grab my attention, which I found funny. You helped me transform, physically and mentally, to be honest I considered you like my second sister. I would stick to you like glue at parties, because I was so scared, people even thought we were dating, well, we did date. Hm, I'm sorry for yelling at you during practice, you and I were, both cranky at that time. Your debut was beautiful though, it was a one in a lifetime experience, and I'm glad that I got to share your 18th with you. If I got to write a speech I think I actually would have but being me, I don't think I would have read it aloud, but I guess that awkward dance with you is good enough. See you next year, we'll be going to the same school. Enjoy your summer while it's still here. 

To Nina/Rabbit/감자깡 -

Abrupt ending to our friendship? Yeah, I would say. I was actually happy that you had a plan in motion for your future when you told me about it, sometimes, I think of you as a child who went through a great deal of misfortune. Whenever I think it couldn't get any worse for you, it does, and when you catch a break, even worse things happen to you. To be honest, most of the time, I didn't know how to reply to most of the things you said, it was just so, awkward. Sometimes, I wouldn't even reply, while other times I would change the subject, or maybe just shoot the quick "Lol". You were probably the one who showed me how to have more fun, convincing me to go to parties, and such. Making me dress better, things that kinda boosted up my self-confidence, telling me to do things that I was too scared to do. Told me to raise my chin high and never enter the battle without any weapons. Hope you get rid of that parasite quickly, along with that, I wish you good luck on your diploma, it's on the day just before mine. Study hard~

To Umi -

At least you didn't change your names multiple times like the people above. Are you still angry at me? Well I think you've always been angry with me from the start, your anger doesn't just disappear on the next day. You're the person that I could talk to about a lot of things, especially gay things, like gay sex. I think you know more than me when comes to gay sex, and I've had gay sex before, sadly. You were actually the first one out of the three that I lost first, but regardless, you were the always the "cool" one. I always viewed you as a strong person, a person that truly believed in their own views and opinions, and would never be scared to argue or tell someone else what you believed in. You gave everyone the cold blunt truth, and that's what you do I guess. I don't know what you're going to do in the future, but I hope it treats you well. 

And finally, to myself -

You've grown a lot, drastic changes if you compare yourself to your old self. Are the changes good? I would assume so, hopefully. This doesn't mean that you won't stop changing or growing though, again, hopefully. Remember when the only friends you had were online? Or remember that time you wore the same black hoodie everyday for school, yeah, embarrassing stuff I know. I guess this is why I named my blog Painful Reminisce, I've watched you grow so much. You're much more comfortable with yourself as a person, more comfortable with your own sexuality, much more content with you as a person. The relationships you've had with not just your past boyfriends but with friends, just gives you more experience and allows you to grow more I guess. Fighting! I'm sure you'll become even more great when I read this in the future, don't let me down!